Finding & Keeping Mom Friends
Let’s face it… finding mom friends is HARD!
When I got pregnant with Izzy I was 21, so you can assume that I didn’t have many friends that had children already. I was dying to find more friends that were moms so we could talk about life, pregnancy, marriage and motherhood!
I had no idea where to even start with finding friends. Throughout my pregnancy I was too sick to go out and meet other moms, after I gave birth I was so exhausted from taking care of a newborn and I was so depressed I didn’t want to do anything. I struggled with staying at home all day and not having much interaction with other adults.
Luckily, I made it past that difficult season! I still am trying to make new mom friends and cultivate the relationships I do have, but I am in a much better place than I was a year ago. So I decided to compile a list of 3 ways to find mom friends, and 5 tips for keeping them!
My first tip on where to find a mom friend is to join mom groups - either online or in person!
You can meet fellow moms at Mommy and Me groups, churches, Facebook groups, Instagram pages, basically anywhere! Take advantage of the resources your community has, and all of the perks of social media.
My second tip on where to find mom friends is to take a class.
Whether it is a class at the gym, a class for a hobby of yours, a story time at the library or local book store, a class for your child to go to, you can meet moms while you either go do something for yourself or for your child! And not only will this be a good way to meet other moms, but you will also be getting out of the house. Which if you are a stay at home mom you know how important that is!
My third way to find a mom friend is to not be afraid to reach out. If you meet a mom while you are running errands, at the park, on a walk, wherever and you really think she seems like she could be a friend, introduce yourself!
You don’t have to be afraid to introduce yourself to other moms and start up a conversation. Say hi to them, ask them if they want to do a play date, get their phone number/Facebook/Instagram - whatever you feel comfortable asking for! They will probably be happy you did!
So, it’s one thing to find mom friends, but it’s another thing to keep them! And I have 5 tips for ways to keep and nurture your friendships!
1. Be yourself.
I know, so cheesy, so cliche, so obvious… but so true! Enough said.
2. Don’t cut off friendships because they have different parenting styles or beliefs.
It’s okay to disagree with things your friends say or do. You don’t have to agree on breastfeeding/bottle feeding, being a stay at home mom or working out of the house, etc. Obviously if they are doing something blatantly wrong then don’t be your friend; but people need to stop cutting off friendships for silly reasons.
3. SAY YES.
This is something I am so guilty of - but am working so hard on. There will always be stuff to do, and if you can make time for your friends you should! Start saying “yes” more when friends ask you to hang out or have play dates.
4. Be encouraging.
A friendship between two moms is a special kind of relationship. Sometimes you just need a fellow mama to tell you that you are doing a great job, your kid is smart, or that they understand how hard teething can be. Use your friendship to build each other up.
5. Be the kind of friend you want to have.
Ugh…. I know, another cliche. But again, so true.
When I was growing up my elementary school had a huge banner that said “Treat others the way you want to be treated”, and that has always stuck with me. Be understanding when your friends are going through a hard time, do nice things for them, and hopefully in return they will do the same!
I know finding and keeping mom friends can be such a difficult thing sometimes, but if you ever need anyone to talk to please feel free to reach out to me! I also have a mom group on Facebook and Instagram messenger if you would like those and meet some wonderful women!