Getting Married Young


My husband and I met when I was a senior in high school. We worked together at our local ice-skating rink and got to know each other at work behind skate rental. I was 17 and he was 20. Which to us it never felt like there was any age gap at all. And in the grand scheme of things, 3 years is a pretty short amount of time.


Within two months of dating I knew that he was “the one”.

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He is THE most understanding, loving, hardworking, silly, and patient person I know. And I do think you can know if someone is the one when you are young and I do think you can know that early on in a relationship.



It’s a very long and complicated story, but a couple years into our relationship we were living together and even though I was only 19 and he was only 23, we were already essentially a married couple: we both worked full time, took care of our apartment, had two cats, what was mine was his and what was his was mine.



For my 20th birthday we went on a trip to Hawaii where Collin proposed (2 days before I turned 20).



I was so excited! We got so many congratulations from our friends and family. We spent the rest of our trip, and my birthday, basking in the post engagement bliss.



But when we returned back home, I started to realize most people were extremely judgmental of how young I was considering I was engaged.



People who I didn’t know would ask me why I wanted to get married. They would tell me that there is no harm in waiting. They would ask what would happen when I got older and regretted my decision.



I would have women I didn’t know come up to me and ask me extremely nosey questions.



They would ask if there was a “timeline” as to why we were getting married so young. Just another way to ask if I was pregnant. As if the only reason to get married young is because you are pregnant or have a child.



People had their own doubts about me and Collin getting married and always felt the need to voice them. When Collin went to Las Vegas for his bachelor party I even had people ask me if I was worried about if he was going to cheat on me. I had someone close to me ask if I really trusted him and they seemed surprised when I had no concerns at all.



It’s not that they didn’t trust Collin, it was because they couldn’t see themselves trusting the person they were with and they were projecting it onto our relationship. I think it is crazy that people were saying this to us just because our age.



If I could give advice to anyone who wants to get married young it would be this…



Don’t let other people influence your decision



I think it is a good thing to get married young if you have found the right person.



Relationships are hard work no matter what age you are. I think marriage is a HUGE symbol of love, trust, and a commitment of wanting to spend the rest of your life with that person.



And if I could do it all over again I would have married Collin the day I turned 18.

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Almost 6 years into our relationship and two years into our marriage, I can say with absolute certainty that I will never regret my decision to marry Collin. I still see him as the most amazing person I have ever met and I know I always will.


Love,

Lily